One of the most challenging transitions in my healing journey was letting go of HOW it was supposed to all happen. I would make calls, send letters, and picture in my mind how the dots were going to connect. Later on I would learn that the brain is a future dot-connect machine. It was not as if I was doing something I was not wired to do. But wired or not, it was not working!

The more I attached myself to a specific result and path, the worse I felt when the outcome did not happen exactly as I had pictured. Each time this would happen—and if felt as if it was happening constantly—it felt like failure. I felt like a failure and it knocked the wind out of my sails! I moved from struggling to suffering within this place of attachment.

Essentially, I could only see a VERY limited number of possibilities when in fact there were and are infinite possibilities in the universe unfolding and potentially at my disposal at all times. Attaching myself to the few that I could imagine is like taking DaVinci’s paint pallet and leaving him with only black paint with which to create a magnificent work of art. That is not how masterpieces are created!

I came to recognize that my life and this journey is a work of art that is ever in process. There is so much for me to learn and so much growth for me to experience. Attaching myself to a specific pathway with my limited perspective is pure EGO driven. I attached to it because it is what I could relate to and within my comfort zone, knowledge, and experience. Accepting that I am an ever-expanding creator of my own masterpiece—ME—encourages patience, trust, allowing and curiosity. I don’t know what I don’t know but I am always ready to expand and trust the process of life. It keeps me humble, hungry, open and thankful that there is a world of possibilities ready to present themselves to my open and curious eyes.