My beliefs around worth and worthiness are old, deep, and I can now say…warped! It has only been over the last few years that I have been able to identify their source, and work toward respectfully and thankfully giving these beliefs back to the well-intended souls that taught me these lessons so well. I was told that my reward for all the good I did and was doing, would be in heaven. That was their belief and I am sure their way of protecting me from disappointment and disillusionment in life. This is what they were taught and that is how they lived and protected themselves. What I came to understand was that I spent my life denying my worth, therefore feeling uncomfortable and unworthy of the “rewards” that were coming my way in abundance.

I believed the amazing abundance I had found myself surrounded by, was there because of my beautiful and talented wife and daughter. When things went remarkably right, I had a belief written in stone at the ready…they deserved this amazing life. I felt that I was merely a stowaway on their journey of worthiness.

When things went wrong, I had part 2 of that belief at the ready…the pain of failure I was feeling was proof that I was not worthy of any of this beauty and bounty in MY life.

Holy cow, did I have it figured out! I am cringing as I type these words knowing that I am on the other side of this belief…most of the time…LOL.

Don’t get me wrong. When I dared to voice any of these warped feelings, I had loving family and friends tell me how much I was worth to the business, to the family or the circle I was in. While I appreciated their support, this did not click a switch that suddenly allowed me to feel worthy. I had to be on my knees, feeling as low as I had ever felt in my life to begin to examine my worth. I realized that, as always, it is an inside job. It was about the work in repairing my self-worth that led me to a place that I could feel worthy. I am finally arriving at the stage of my journey where I can say that I do feel self-worth which is building daily. I am confident that, for the balance of my journey, I will be ready to accept that I am worthy in THIS life to enjoy, savor, share, and celebrate the fruits of my worth.